THE RECENT SUICIDE OF A TEENAGE SON OF FRIENDS prompts me to share the opinions and advice of psychologists, psychiatrists and other experts who believe the seeds of suicide are sown in childhood and are reaped after a final harvest of isolation from loved ones and hope, leading to self-destruction.

THE FIRST FIVE YEARS of a child’s life are most important — setting in place a foundation of self-worth, and feelings of being loved and protected, that can help sustain a person all of his or her life. Inner strength comes from being loved and valued by parents, who are as gods to children.

WE ARE NOT LAYING A GUILT TRIP ON WORKING PARENTS, but it is reassuring when Mom or Dad is there with love, understanding and patience when an elbow is scraped, when a bully strikes, or when a dog frightens.

MILK AND COOKIES AFTER SCHOOL are better digested with a mom or dad present to add a hug and listen to highlights of the day. However, child-care experts agree that even one loving parent, full- or part-time, can raise a happy, well-adjusted youngster. Good to know that in this crazy, divorce-ridden society.

DON’T BELIEVE THAT A “PERFECT CHILD” with no indications of any problems, couldn’t end his life. There are always clues if parents are alert. Emotionally secure children do not commit suicide. Kids who are overweight, homely or outcasts in their school have a tougher time coping. But here again, parental love can give them the strength to survive life’s cruelties.

A HAPPY, LOVING CHILDHOOD, with enough to eat and a clean bed, should be every child’s birthright. Face it, millions are denied basic needs, including love. Many end up as runaways, prostitutes (desperate for attention and affection), or drug users (trying to feel love); the walking wounded among us barely surviving.

WHEN YOUR KIDS ARE THE MOST OBNOXIOUS, withdrawn, rebellious pains-in-the-neck, that’s when they need you the most. Of course it isn’t easy, but parents must remain calm, firm, loving and concerned. Get children professional help if you realize their attitudes are out of control and if you think they might harm themselves. Better prevention than mourning.

KEEPING COMMUNICATION OPEN with teenagers is vital. Talking, showing your concern, and offering love, support and a shoulder to cry on do make a difference. There are no perfect parents, no perfect kids and no perfect roadmap. Do the best you can with guidance and love.

OUR HEARTBROKEN FRIENDS LOST A WONDERFUL SON, who was full of promise and full of problems. They lost the battle to save him from his demons, but they never stopped trying.

WHO IS THE GAUCHE CEO who had a party in stitches because he started munching the potpourri he saw in a small dish? He chewed the leaves and a dried blossom before he realized his mistake and joined in on the laughter. The hostess was to blame. Drinks and no snacks made for a hungry guest desperate for food.

WHO WAS THE GOLD COASTER who got his signals crossed and sent his wife a sexy, lacy bra and thongs in a size small, meant for his mistress on Valentine’s Day? His wife, an extra-large, bought his alibi that the shop made an error, but it cost him big bucks at Lester Lampert jewelry salon.

WHILE EVERYONE IS CONCENTRATING on helping Haiti, we must applaud the efforts of actress Raquel Welch who has been providing attractive wigs to women who have lost their hair from cancer chemotherapy. Welch and Hair U Wear created her line of wigs and have donated more than $1 million worth each year to the American Cancer Society. Raquel, 69, has an exquisite head of red hair and knows how much women treasure their own. Her wigs make a big difference.

I KNOW A WOMAN LIKE THAT, the inspiring documentary directed and written by Elaine Madsen, former Chicagoan and mother of movie star Virginia Madsen, deserves to be on screens for years. Elaine interviewed a dozen extraordinary women over the age of 65, each of whom is still busy pursuing their passions. Lucille Borgen, 95, water skis competitively. Sadly, Eartha Kitt, who celebrated her 80th birthday by giving a concert at Carnegie Hall, has since died. Gloria Steinem, 75, is going strong as a civil rights activist. Rita Moreno, 77, has a cabaret show. Evanston mayor Lorraine Morton, 73, is in her 14th year serving her town. Elaine, 77, is in the flick as well. She is an Emmy-award winning writer, producer, playwright and poet. Her latest book of poems, Crayola Can’t Make These Colors: From The Palette of a Life in Verse, was published last year.

THE WOMEN’S BOARD OF OUR AMERICAN CANCER SOCIETY DESERVES KUDOS for all the money raised and the services provided for cancer patients. Among their dedicated volunteers are: Maryann Rasmussen, Joni Jacobsen, Katherine Abelson (whose mother Hope started the board), Beverly Blettner, Marcia Buchanan, Carrie Callegari, Toni Canada, Terry Caufield, Maria Ciecura, Stacey Cruse, Theresa Davis, Julie Dillon, Barbara Dow-Clayton, Toni Elipas, Bridget Flanagan, Bonita Friedland, Donna Harper, Constance Jones, Micaela Klein, Rebecca Lester, Shannon Luloff, Melissa Marino-Triska, Nancy Null, Cristina Persico, Janice Robson, Helen Schubert, Stephanie Sherman, Connie Teska, Stacy Theodorakakis, Erika Ugianskis, May Vadevoulis, Pam Westin and Nancy Westlake.

MATRIARCH JOAN WEGNER OF THE JEL SERT “FUN FOODS” is pleased now that Royal, Wyler’s, Flavor Aid and some Snapple products are added to the company’s brands. Her products are sold all over the globe.

POOR DENNIS KOZLOWSKI, serving his time for stealing funds from Tyco International. His 25-year term is bad enough, and his wife divorced him, but what does he pine for? His dogs! “Simply seeing my dogs would mean so much to me,“ he wrote to friends. (He can’t be all that bad if he likes dogs.)

WHO IS THE CHICAGO MOVIE STAR who has a sister so fearful of her ex-husband that they had to keep her second marriage a deep secret so he wouldn’t show up and create mayhem? The newlyweds then moved out of state.

ENTERTAINER/ACTRESS MITZI GAYNOR, born here as Mitzi Gerber, but no relation to us, brings her show, Razzle Dazzle! My Life Behind the Sequins, to the Star Plaza Theatre on March 26.

IF HUMPTY DUMPTY TOOK A BAD FALL, and Michelle and William Marhoefer were around, he’d be back in fine shape! The Marhoefers have master’s degrees from the Art Institute of Chicago as qualified restorers of porcelain, pottery, ceramics, wood, ivory, metal, stone and art objects, and operate Broken Art Restoration at 1841 W. Chicago Ave. Well-known dentist Thomas Ward tells us they bring valued items back to life. If only they could fix broken hearts.

PORTIA DE ROSSI, beloved of Ellen DeGeneres, has a comedy in her future, written by My Name Is Earl producer Victor Fresco. It is about a nice guy in a bad world. Isn’t that all of us?

OUR FOUR SEASONS HOTEL, site of so many important social and civic events, has a scandalous past. At least that is what founder and CEO Isadore Sharp reports in his memoir, Four Seasons: The Story of a Business Philosophy. At his first inn, in Toronto in 1961, “a young starlet took off all her clothes and swam stark naked the length of the pool, turned, swam back and then walked dripping wet through the courtyard and lobby.” After the local newspaper reported it under a heading, “The Naked and the Fled,” armies of guests began flocking there in hopes of a repeat performance. Sharp says profits skyrocketed and his small, unknown hotel went on to grow and prosper.

SEX AND THE CITY ENDURES, and there are great expectations for the sequel out on May 28. Sarah Jessica Parker, Cynthia Nixon, Kim Cattrall and Kristin Davis are said to love the script, the clothes, and the fact that the present economic crisis figures into their lives. Who else is sorry that handsome hunk Gilles Marini, (Samantha’s Malibu neighbor who was seen in the nude) isn’t in this film? Jennifer Hudson, so great in the first movie, isn’t in this one either as the storyline takes different turns. Parker, busy with her twins, is the least attractive actress in the universe, according to men who rate “hot” women. She is the only actress we’ve received negative feedback about, and from so many different guys. They really hate her looks. But hey, it is what you have in your heart (and your contract) that matters. We’ve written about the film plot in past columns so suffice to say there’s enough drama for everyone. In real life, Nixon announced her engagement to girlfriend Christine Marinoni, and Cattrall split from chef Alan Wyse. Davis is busy with her fashion line and found love with photographer Russell James. Parker has been hyping her new fragrance, Coty’s SJP NYC, a fruity floral.

THE SECOND LAKE SHORE SALON SERIES, with KMP artists, saw Spider Saloff singing Funny Valentine and other love songs at a Feb.14 soiree in the home of Frank Krug. On April 25, Steven Brinberg does his amazing “Simply Barbra” Streisand show in the home of Bill Buchman and Lee Lichamer. Vienna to Weimar was the theme of K.T. Sullivan and Karen Kohler’s concert held in the Evanston house of Allan and Carla Price. Event hosts were Andrew Delicata and Kristopher McDowell. K.T. Sullivan, who was in Police Academy, is married to James Downey. Karen Kohler, popular cabaret star, is wed to Paul Kohler of Kohler, Wis.

WITH ALL THE EXCITEMENT over Elvis Presley’s 75th birthday (but he has left the building, if not the crypt) we must share our choice for The King’s throne. He’s a singer called Danny Memphis and he’s from the city Elvis loved. Danny sounds so much like Presley he leaves all other imitators in the dust. He shares Elvis’ concern for others and helped a young girl dying of leukemia. She left him her valued music collection and he played and sang at her funeral. His band is called Danny Memphis and the Extraordinaires. His Chicago cousins are so proud of his talents.

BRO ON THE GO is the wise and witty new book by How I Met Your Mother actor and womanizer Barney Stinson, who is the expert on all things regarding life, love, babes, boobs and brothers. Written with Matt Kuhn, it offers the Ten Commandments of The Bro Code. For example: A Bro never wears pink, even in Europe; a Bro never sends a greeting card to another bro. You’re getting Barney’s vision of the ideal behavior of hip males.

IMERMAN ANGELS, cancer support group, presents its Spring Fling benefit at Enclave on March 18. Call 877-274-5529 for more information.

GIRL SCOUTS will honor Mellody Hobson of Ariel Investments on March 10 at a Four Seasons benefit, for achievement and inspiring young girls.

OOPS! JANE PAULEY is 59, reader Judith Jenkins corrects us. We graciously cut 10 years off her age.

A GLAM ACADEMY AWARDS Red Carpet party is March 7 in the Palm Court of the Drake Hotel, reports Shaun Rajah.

STANLEY HILTON is mourning the death of his elegant, charming mother, Jenny Hilton Cooper, 95.

“THE REAL ART OF CONVERSATION is not only to say the right thing at the right time but to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.” — Dorothy Nevill

Mail news and photos to 5036 Fairview Lane, Skokie, IL 60077 , or call 847-677-2232, or e-mail annbgerber@gmail.com.