SHOCKING? UNUSUAL? Who are you kidding? Couples divorcing after 30, 40 and 50 years are the tip of the iceberg!

MILLIONS WOULD PROBABLY DIVORCE if they could afford it, or if they didn’t have religious obligations, or if they could resolve guilt feelings, or if they were not afraid to alienate their kids or grandkids.

WHY DO SO MANY MEN AND WOMEN CHEAT? They’re bored to death, or out of lust, and probably love, and face it. Thirty, 40 and 50 years is a long time and, hey, life is soon over and this is all there is? Other men and women look good, and are available, and affairs happen after years with the same mate.

LOYALTY, GRATITUDE, AND LOVE (WE DO ADMIT) keep most married couples together, but honestly, don’t you know several unions where there are loose bounds? We refer to couples who always go out “with the boys” and “with the girls” or get together as couples just on the weekends OR NOT AT ALL.

AL AND TIPPER GORE, WHO HAVE GROWN APART, have the money and the class to break up right. No messy fights, no “other loves” that we learn about. But when love is gone, it is gone. And they want love back in their lives. Good for them.

YOU NEVER OUTGROW YOUR NEED FOR LOVE, and the drive to find it again becomes more urgent the older one gets.

MATURE ADULTS CAN LOVE ONE PERSON FOR A LIFETIME. But how many adults are mature when they fall in love and wed at 18, 19, 20 or even 35?

YOUNG PEOPLE TODAY live together, sleep around and laugh at conventional marriage vows.

THEY WILL HAVE FEWER DIVORCES because they can just walk away. But at what emotional and financial costs? There are no free lunches.

WHO CAN DENY THE THRILL of desire for love that makes the world go round, and makes the ride worthwhile?

GO GORES, GO! You have a lot of living to do and loving to find. Godspeed.

WHO IS THE UNGRATEFUL SON — whose mother slaved as a single mom to give him good schooling, buy him a partnership in a productive firm, and guided him for 34 years — who wouldn’t allow her to attend his wedding? He sent her a five-page letter blaming her for earlier problems and the loss of his father, through divorce. It has been a month since his fancy wedding and her tears haven’t stopped.

WHO IS THE BEST GRANNY? It’s the pretty Lake Forest widow who invites her five grandkids over for a sleepover every Friday night and helps them bake their own pizzas. Then Saturday mornings she

makes their favorite blueberry Swedish pancake breakfast. She’s Judy Lipin, a redheaded charmer.

WHO TOUCHED DOWN via a helicopter to join guests at his 75th birthday party at his Stone Manor home in Lake Geneva? The 200 who cheered entrepreneur/adventurer Chuck Hannon are calling the black-tie affair the blast of the year, orchestrated by elegant wife Fortunee Massuda. She provided entertainers and a gastronomical trip around the globe.

THE POPULAR SHAUN RAJAH of the Drake Hotel will turn 30 on July 22 and he’s planning a super party.

IF YOUR FATHER IS LITERATE AND A GOLFER, and that’s not an oxymoron, he’d love Golf Sonnets, by James Long Hale who has penned 18 amusing, illustrated Shakespearean sonnets about the game. He’s the Tiger Woods of poetry. See www.golfsonnets.com.

ARCHITECT/DESIGNER FRANK GEHRY was here to show Tiffany clients some of his jewelry, especially a $1 million flower brooch and a $50,000 tiara (for wearing to RL at lunch.)

THOSE HEAVENLY IMERMAN ANGELS, who match cancer survivors to patients, will hold a benefit June 26 on the rooftop at the Lakeshore Athletic Club. Call 877-274-5529.

ACTOR VINCE VAUGHN has an amazing mom, Shea, 60, who is a fitness and wellness expert who looks fab, dahling. She impressed all at Lululemon Athletica, on Rush Street, with her self-empowering, Eastern philosophy using ancient and contemporary movements. Shea has a 6-DVD set that everyone wanted. THE KING HARRISES AND THE JOHN HARRISES will co-chair the June 25 Chicago Botanic Garden ball.

TAKE YOUR FATHER TO TEA June 20 at the Drake Hotel. He-men drink tea with their loved ones.

IN A SEA OF HANDSOME COUPLES at the Joffrey Ballet benefit gala, we spotted movie-star gorgeous dancers Fabrice Calmels and Yumelia Garcia who made a perfect picture. NOT THAT YOU REALLY CARE, but word is that the once glamorous, stunning actress Brigitte Bardot is back in St. Tropez. She made that fair site, and the bikini, famous. Now an animal activist, she has left the Paris scene and husband, rightwing politician Bernard d’Ormale. Thanks to Brigitte’s photos, showing a once-beautiful face deeply lined with corduroy-like wrinkles, viewers are using sunblock. We’ve seen her pictures as warnings, in beauty parlors abroad.

AN ALWAYS BEAUTIFUL DATE, the Dearborn Garden Walk is from noon to 5 p.m. July 18 for viewing of private backyards. Call 312-632-1241 for more information.

WHO DOESN’T ADMIRE WARREN BUFFETT? The billionaire is starring in a kids’ cartoon series that teaches good financial habits to help them the rest of their lives. The Secret Millionaire’s Club talks about avoiding debt, supply and demand, weeding out Bernie Madoff types, er, only kidding. It is a great lesson for kids.

WHO WERE THE GOLD COAST COUPLE, breaking their engagement, who dined for “one last time” at Kiki’s Bistro, 900 N. Franklin St., where both loved the French cuisine and ambiance? Well, to make my long sad story a short happy one, after two bottles of wine and comforting dishes, they kissed and set the date for their wedding!

THE BEST QUOTE OF THE WEEK is from Julia Roberts on Oprah: “Don’t they say that your brain starts to get mushy after 40? Along with your tush?”

THE 8TH ANNUAL PAWS CHICAGO BEACH PARTY at the North Avenue Castaways on July 22 is being planned by pet lovers Christine Mallul, founder Paula Fasseas, Bonnie Spurlock, plus a slew of other dedicated animal activists including: Deborah Chapman, the David Fields, Maria Smithburg, Jaclene Tetzlaff, Jim O’Neal, Kimberly Gleeson, Shari Johnson, Susan Germaine, the Chuck Jordans, Linda Leahy, Carole Lenders, Michael Marrion, Nancy Timmers, Lisa Snider, Virginia Stafman, Nancy Sterling, Tina Tromiczak, Judy Tullman, Amy Turk, Stephanie Prousis and Lynne Styles.

MARSHALL FIELD’S ISN’T COMING BACK, but so many wish it would. It is like restoring virginity. It isn’t going to happen. Yet at the recent stockholders meeting of Macy’s in Cincinnati, Jim McKay, co-organizer of FieldsFansChicago.org, told Macy’s CEO Terry Lundgren that just a few weeks ago a survey of 521 shoppers indicated 81 percent of them asked for the return of Field’s which was converted into Macy’s. And that 71 percent said they were shopping there less. According to Women’s Wear Daily, Lundgren replied that our Macy’s is one of the top five stores out of 69 in the country and that the Walnut Room at the State Street store had its biggest year ever, serving 4,000 meals in December. ... Get over it. Field’s isn’t coming back.

JOHN REILLY PHOTOGRAPHY, at 358 W. Ontario St., announced its association with Sheri Whitko Photography at a reception attended by scores of fans.

LEADING THE KIDS 5K RUN/WALK for Children’s Memorial Hospital on June 19 will be an amazing young man, Chase Malackowski, who lost part of his leg to cancer and is now in remission. Chase, 11, is hoping the annual race on the lakefront, and the charity he founded, Wheels for Wishes, will help other children with cancer. He is seeking Hot Wheels to sell, but on Saturday this brave boy will lead an army of dedicated cancer fighters.

GEMINIS (MAY 21 TO JUNE 20) are bright, curious, versatile and resourceful says astrologer Laurie Brady. They need mental stimulation to avoid boredom. July 21 is a dangerous time for love, insists Laurie, and children could cause problems. (So what else is new?) More writers are born under this sign than other signs. Examples are Jerzy Kosinski, Herman Wouk, Salman Rushdie, Bennett Cerf, Rachel Carson, Norman Cousins, Joyce Carol Oates, John Cheever and Ian Fleming. Other Geminis are: Angelina Jolie, Jolante Ruege, Lee Flaherty, Irene Michaels, Sheldon Good, Nesita Kwan, Roe Conn, Larry Lujack, Maria Pappas, Kari Kupcinet, Sasha Obama, Prince, Mark Wahlberg, Johnny Depp, Michael J. Fox, Joan Rivers, Billy Joel, Candice Bergen, Jane Byrne, Drew Carey, Dr. Henry Betts, State Rep. Jan Schakowsky, Candace Jordan, Mike Myers, Anne Heche, Larry Wert, Ramsey Lewis, Felicia Middlebrooks, Gale Sayers, Jorie Lueloff, Heidi Klum, Elisabeth Hasselbeck, Bar Refaeli, Clint Eastwood, Colin Farrell, Brooke Shields and Joe Namath.

THE LATE, GREAT JOE KELLMAN AND VONITA REESCER are the two honorees of the Apparel Industry Board and Better Boys Foundations’ gala June 30 at the Four Seasons.

AMBASSADOR RITVA JOLKKONEN, CONSUL GENERAL OF FINLAND, was featured at the June 15 meeting of the Finnish American Chamber of Commerce at the Mid-America Club. Retiring honorary consul Frederick Niemi was cheered and his successor Olli Goos was welcomed. Tony Johansson, president of FACC presided.

A CABARET NIGHT JUNE 20 is planned at the Drake Hotel’s Palm Court beginning 6 p.m. with special performances.

“IRON MAN” ROBERT DOWNEY JR. stars June 19 at the Ritz hotel benefit for the Gene Siskel Film Center. His fans are excited about meeting their idol and hearing him in a special discussion about his career, says Jean de St. Aubin, executive director of the Center. Wellington Reiter will present Downey with a Renaissance Award. Tickets are $400. Call 312-846-2072 for more information.

FATHER’S DAY IS JUNE 20 and if your dad is still around, tell him you love and appreciate him before it is too late and he’s gone. There are no perfect fathers and no perfect children, so do the best you can. Your father did the best that he could.

“MY FATHER WAS FRIGHTENED BY HIS MOTHER. I was frightened by my father, and I’m damned well going to make sure that my children are frightened of me.” — George V

“THE MOST IMPORTANT THING a father can do for his children is to love their mother.” –Theodore Hesburgh

“THE THING THAT IMPRESSES ME MOST ABOUT NORTH AMERICA is the way fathers and mothers obey their children.” — Edward, Duke of Windsor

“TODAY, WHILE THE HEAD OF THE FAMILY MAY STILL BE THE FATHER, everyone knows he is little more than chairman of the entertainment committee.” – Ashley Montagu ... Be that as it may, we love you daddy.